Originally posted by Kiongakyu here. Reposted with permission.
Welcome to your first, or to your one thousandth, munch! Please always keep the following things in mind.
If you would not do it in front of your mother or your child, please refrain from doing it at the munch.
We need to keep in mind that we are at vanilla venues, regardless if we happen to be in a semi-private room. We have the other customers to consider, children in the venue to consider, and the waitstaff to consider. We have zero right to involve them in our lifestyle without their consent.
- What this means plainly is that overt sexual behavior is not acceptable. Period.
- Likewise, clothing choices that are overtly sexual, notably BDSM oriented or excessively exposing are not acceptable. Period.
- Also, discussions that can be overheard clearly (including in bathrooms folks!) that are lifestyle oriented or sexually oriented are not acceptable. Period.
Flatly, we are representatives of our culture. If we wish acceptance and respect
we have to be willing to grant the same. If we, as a culture and community, wish to be able to keep having socials and munches, then we must avoid making it difficult or uncomfortable for other cultures and communities to function next to us.
A munch or social is not a meat market.
- A munch or social is a place to come to meet folks in a safe, public environment.
- It is for helping people develop trust between one another, and for facilitating the development of friendships.
- It is a place to learn and be able to responsibly converse with others of like minds.
- It is a stepping stone into paths of exploration and education.
- It is not a place to troll, advertise, fish about, or otherwise beg for contact information. Period.
- It is not a new-fangled version of speed dating. Period.
- Is it not a fantasy dungeon in a public setting. Period.
If we as individuals make munches and socials a place where people feel preyed upon, or feel unsafe, then we are no better than the oft degraded vanillas we so commonly judge ourselves against.
In Pride and Service,
Ki